The Joking Type

When I was a young boy, I used to eat chicken nuggets

But Now I put away them young boy ways

Now I'm living like a grown boy

Now I"m eating on the Buffalo Chicken Wings

Wings so good

come on baby eating wings so good

sometimes grub don't feel like it should

wings so good.

This is just a joke..

This whole post.

I feel that we are all entitled to have a little fun every once in awhile right

otherwise what is the point? Not having fun is for losers.

oh oh oh oh Jackie Bleu

Jackie Bleu Cheese lives her life in a low fat style

at the top of the Buffalo Chicken Pile

oh oh oh oh oh Jackie Bleu

The cheese is smelly and so are you

I mean its really all about the money but it is important to have fun at least once every few years to keep the moral up. Good Moral is a very undervalued natural resource. We could all use a little boost in moral

A Whales Vagina

Me and My Friends. Haha yeah right.

Wednesday Wednesday Wonderful Wednesday I went outside to throw away some liquor bottles but the dumpster was missing, so instead I got a nice coffee buzz and listened to various 80s Jams. Sometimes when I get stuck with the writing it really helps to pull out something old that I havent read in awhile.  You know? Just reflect on something you already did and put yourself back in that same frame of mind. Some of the journal pages have spilled beer, tomato sauce, wierd stickers, toenail clippings  and crinkles that add character to the pages.  I love language. I wish I was bilingual, I only know bits and pieces of a few languages Spanish, Japanese, a little French.  I could never learn another language in school only by immersion and asking people annoying questions "how do say? how do you say? how do you say?"
With more lingual power i could climb the highest mountains and scour the dirtiest alleys searching for good conversation and company. Stay hungry and you will eat. By the way, last night I told these people about how if I was ever pursued by Renegade White Sharks I would find safety by hiding inside a whales vagina. Of course I realize that it would only be a matter of time before I was crushed to death by a giant whale penis. So I guess its not really a good plan. I have gone to the burrito place nearly five times this week. Is there any hope for our hero? Will one taco dinner ever be enough? Tune in next week for the exciting conclusion. 


Good Day to All

Homeless Traffic Director

 One day while walking down Armitage street near the Chicago Bagel Authority I saw a nice BMW SUV get into an accident with a standard yellow cab. The swanky SUV guy got out and looked at the damage to his car and started freaking out. The taxi driver just sat calmly in his cab as if not to notice the swanky guy screaming at his driver side window. It was funny that this guy was being so dramatic. In the meantime traffic has been building up the whole time both in front of and behind the SUV BMW and cab. This homeless guy who would always hang out among all the local eatery's, was sitting on a stoop at street level eating a sandwich and sunning himself when he noticed the many honks from the ever increasing traffic. I watched him stand up dust himself off and walk over to the street. I gasped as he raised one arm with an open palm as if to say "stop" and then waived his other hand as if to say "go." Signaling the cars on the opposite side to go through the only open lane. I kept laughing thinking that it was so funny that this guy felt like it was his job to direct traffic despite having no obligation to do so. Further more the people he was directing were actually complying and following his directions even though he had no real authority.  I must have laughed for a good ten or twenty minutes. It was actually kind of awesome. I wonder what happened when the cops came? What did they say to the SUV guy and the CAB guy and the NICE homeless man. The Homeless Traffic Director.