The Ten Keg Commandments

The Ten Keg Commandments

From "The Most Interesting Barback in the World"

10. Keep your Cooler Clean, it is a temple. Pay Tribute to Planet Kegatron! 

All Hail Kegatron

9. You can Haul Empty Kegs on an Empty stomach but you have to be Full in order to haul Full Kegs (About 175 lbs or so) Eat Plenty of McDonald's Breakfast Sandwiches (Bacon, Egg, and Cheese Biscuit preferably) Drink Coffee for energy.


8. Use proper Keg form (very similar to a Squat, Power Clean, Dead lift, but with an element of rowing)

7. Always remember that Kegs = American Muscle (Even if you are not from The States) 


7.5 Shout out to Harry Fridas from Australia who once single handedly hauled 100 Kegs of Fat Tire Amber Ale while working at The Wrigley Rooftops 773 Tickets. (Afterword he said "Fat Tire Please") 

Harry got deported but with your help we can export a keg of Fat Tire to him in Sydney

Kegman

6. If a keg is going to fall, just let it. (It might fall on your foot or you'll get a hernia trying to wrestle it. Just let it fall and do 25 push ups as customary with a Keg Foul. Drop a Fat Tire and do 50!)


5. No drinking on the job. Drinking IS the JOB!






4. If a girl asks you if you need help. Always say no. (unless she wants to help you drink Fat Tire.)


3. While Keg Hauling try not to let sweaty kegs press against your pant legs because you will have stains everywhere. 


2. During Work hours your keg coworkers (Keg men of America) are your fraternal brothers, treat them as such.


1. Never let the Kegs Run Dry!

Bonus Tip: While Keg Hauling, Remember to always shout "POW" In the style of Mark Walhberg from his workout video Form, Focus, Fitness  


Happy Hauling in 2012

Top Ten Things That Matter In Everyday Life

Punctuality

Making a late payment and showing up late are essentially the same thing.  When you show up late, you are not only wasting other peoples time (bringing down moral) but giving the impression that you are incompetent.  My coach used to say "Being 15 minutes early is better than being 5 minutes late." Sometimes you can't help it and when that happens just take responsibility for what happened, nobody likes excuses. Time is money, how are you spending yours? No one ever got fired for being early.  

Appearance

Most of the time a simple costume is all the audience needs to believe in a character. In our society we all  label/judge people based on the clothing they wear or don't wear. Don't let your fashion choices send the wrong message about you. Take pride in your appearance and remember that someone is always watching. Make sure that when you engage in a job or activity you at least look the part. People always judge a book by its cover. Often times what you see, really is what you get.  Just ask this guy.    

Become What You Are

For a long time now, I have been putting off becoming what I have always wanted to become....Me.