Dale The Angry Radio Guy

Last year in late September I traveled to Indiana where I have traveled many times in recent years to work on a film project. This was a fun project because I got to create all of the scenes without the other actors voice and without any of the music or visuals added in post. This project was a big lesson in blocking for me. I must say that these folks at Valiant Dead LLC really did a fine job with the lighting on this project. I went to college for radio and this was a fun role to do. It's funny I had a short stint working for a CBS station before I became disillusioned with the world of radio broadcasting and began to pursue Acting instead which has now led me to playing an angry ham radio operator. 
Kudos to James Treakle, and Valiant Dead LLC on a great job with this project Enjoy. 

That's The Way Uh Huh Uh Huh I Like It

That's the way uh huh uh huh I like it. I have had that song in my head all day. Kind of taking a much needed day off to catch up on the finer things in life. went to the basketball court today and kicked every ones ass. My game has never been better. It only took about 8 years to learn the fucking sport. I'm literally listening to That's the way Uh Huh Uh Huh I like it on repeat over and over again for an indefinite period of undetermined time. but that's the way i like it. Who knows what the rest of tonight holds for our heroes but we will see what adventure awaits. 

My friend who is going through a break up called me and said that his girlfriend had sent him a text saying that she hated him and was over him and blah blah blah fucking blah blah blah blahbibitty blah blah blah blah. Anyway I told him to send her "That's The Way Uh Huh Uh Huh I Like It." It worked like a charm. do do do do do do do do do. 

My Friends are always Drunk

I have been quite busy and frantic this morning. Living life to the absolute fullest and richest. I enjoyed a refined breakfast of steak and eggs. The steak proved to be very nourishing and enriching to my tired frame. Upon leaving my place I stopped for coffee and a trip to the bank for a friendly conversation with a genuinely interested teller who really seemed to care about my deposit. There is much to do today. Some of my very best friends are calling me to meet them for drinks but its only 930 am...... Is that too early to get naughty?

Unsure of what to do I took a long stroll all the way to the lakefront where I came to rest upon a bench in the misty breeze of scenic lake Michigan. The lake is my favorite part of living in Chicago. I can remember when I first moved here I thought that living by the lake was like living by the ocean. Ha what a dumb ass. Actually I didn't really think that, I always knew the size of these large bodies of water. Speaking of bodies of water, isn't that what we are? We are flesh bags containing water and other goodies. I have a feeling that too much time has been spent on this subject for now.

Anyway. Listing to the sound of the lake I witnessed a bicycle rider punch an unsuspecting Asian man in the head as he rode by because the poor fellow was standing in the bike lane (Life in the bike Lane). Totally not cool bro. He should have just slapped his ass. Holy shit man. What the hell was that dudes problemo? I feel very aggravated by all the shit heads and dip shits here. My visit to the lake has been ruined. Back to the lab.

(Cue batman sound effects and spinning logo)

I spent a few hours writing in my trusty journal to calm my nerves and soothe my bitter frustrations. By comparison I am a new man, a better man, a more refined man than I had been earlier in the day. What a turn of events. As I look toward the evening I keep getting calls from my friends at the bar. I can't believe they are still drinking. Surely they are sustaining themselves by eating mini burgers and other appetizers. Should I meet them? Should I go out and try to be a good friend? Or should I stay home and sit alone in the dark plotting the demise of the corporate machine? I'm going out.

I love to read cuz it is fun

I love to read cuz it is fun

I read books to everyone

Stay up all night with a real page turner

Sci Fi fantasy mystery murder

Self help how to poetry bios

Graphic novel newspaper secret files

Magazine innards off the press from the printer

Cook books on the stove serve them for dinner

How to be a winner for beginners and novices

Lists about making better lists at offices

Happily ever after dystopian Apocalypse

Digest the reader and close the cover on politics

Stick my nose in a book toucan said to follow it

Check it out free or pay a lot at the colleges

Sit around a lot with a book in my gaze

How I love to read let me count the ways

One I read a book in the tub

Two I read a book in the club

Three I read a book on a date

Four I read a book in a crate

Five I read a book in a fight

Six I book a room and a flight

READ 

READ AGAIN

READ 

READ MY FRIEND

READ

CUZ IT IS FUN

READ TO EVERYONE

I prefer to shower after I read.

A book I recieved from a dear friend. 

From The Desk Of BallPark Frank

I get big in the paint like a big man on canvas
Frank on the globe write rhymes on the atlas
Make all the money to buy all the makers
On your mark get set on the plate like taters
Better now than laters i glide like the skaters
Always rip ass when i'm in the elavators
Darth like the vaders light saber tooth tigers
Watching us now in the eye of the fighter
Lit like a lighter cuz got spins like the dryer
Walking home looking like the man on the wire
I burn rubber like a fire breathing dragon with a magnum 
Condom i got at the spot when I bought gum 
Got some awesome nachos with cheese sauce and quac yo
An ice cream snickers and a choco taco
Got the tic tacs and tactics the stretch like elastic
I love the fans cuz they are fantastic 

Dale Fanella Working For A Living

Contact me at your leisure if you ever need a actor, performer, emcee, writer, model. I  also excel at hauling kegs and brand ambassador work.

Graveyard Shift

I Have Been To The Mountaintop

Another late night for your pal Dale. Oh how I do love a good all nighter but I'm afraid the time has finally come for me to put a stop to this madness. You see for five long years now I have been working the graveyard shift here in FM world where I believe I have made the best of it. For what it's worth I stuck it out for a long time and tried hard to advance myself. During my time here I spent many many hours dedicated to study and self growth. I seriously feel like I have done so much studying here that by now I must have earned some kind of Special Edition Masters Degree. (Any Takers?) You might ask "What is the next step for my pal Dale?" Well to be honest my only real plan is to get out of here at the end of the night and as I walk outside breathe deeply while holding my hands high in the air before screaming for all to hear "I'm Back In The World!" It's like I've been trying to tell you guys. "You can't keep a good man down." Eight Days A Week by The Beatles is playing right now....what a good tune. That is one thing I am going to really miss about this gig.....the tunes. For about five years now they have felt like my tunes. This place has all the familiarity of home to me. Its a heavy feeling you know, leaving a place that feels like home for the last time. This will be an exciting new opportunity for growth and expansion. So glorious is the feeling of knowing that at least for the time being this is my last third shift for awhile. They call it the graveyard shift because the graveyard is where you are headed if you keep working one.  There is also this great short story by Stephen King (One of my Faves BTW) called "Graveyard Shift" about a awesome isolated small town textile mill that has become overrun by ravenous mutated rats/bats etc..... There is a movie adaption of this Epic short story which is also called "Graveyard Shift." I highly recommend watching as there are many scenes worth laughing at. I sure am gonna miss this place but on the flip side if I stay in this place any longer I sure am gonna miss out on a lot of chances for continued entertainment success. I guess I haven't written a post of this length since way back in November when I started this whole 1000waystoblog experiment. The experiment was to see if I could start a blog that didn't suck and sure as the sun rises this blog most definitely did not suck.  I cannot stress to you enough how important it is to me to never have to do another overnight shift. YAHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. I'm so Excited and I just can't hide it. and I know I know I know I know I know I want to. A few songs have gone by since "Eight Days a Week" Now Phil Collins "In the Air Tonight" rules the airwaves. Some of the best and most revealing moments I have ever had were right here behind the control board under the shadow of night and the in the solitude of my own company. It has been a most excellent journey. "and Ive been waiting for this moment for all my life" The journey is not over but just changing as things on this earth tend to. "I can feel it coming in the air tonight." This song rules. Makes me feel like a cinematic bad ass every time I walk around with it playing.  Let me know if you or anyone you know is looking for a hard working young Actor, Entertainer, Interesting Barback, Comedic Writer Etc.....See you in the World. 

Every Rose Has It's Thorn

I was at the Bulls Game when Derek Rose tore his ACL. I saw it happen (from the upper deck) I cannot express how heartbroken I am for him. I think people that take pro sports to seriously are losers but I feel that something like this transcends sports drama. This guy is so humble and like able. How could this happen? I remember that in the stands we all thought that he wasn't hurt all that bad and we all started chanting "MVP, MVP, MVP" Hoping for him to get up and let us know he was okay. He never did. Later in the day I was talking with a friend who was watching on tv and said that rose appeared to know immediately that he was severely injured. Then I thought about how when everyone was chanting "MVP" Derek already knew he was done. How bad he must have felt. I feel like it was the equivalent of seeing Mufasa get killed or watching the one ewok try to wake up the other one who died during the battle at the end of "Return of the Jedi" Then today I saw that jackass at Nike was making fun of Roses injury. Have you no decency. The nicest guy in the league, never done anything wrong to anyone and your gonna take a cheap shot at him because he didn't endorse your company's shoes? What an ass. I'd like to bust his knee and then see how funny he thinks it is. Derek Rose kind of reminds me of Chicago and all its hard working citizens. I know he will be back but I just bummed that this happened to him.  I still feel that the Bulls still have a shot at the title but its going to be a tough battle to win without the MVP. Hang in there Derek we are all pulling for you.

Dale Fanella

Derek Rose Poem

D Rose

I am a huge fan of Derek Rose. I really admire his humble attitude and lightning fast moves on the court. This one is for you D Rose. 

There once was a rose who came from the street

He Grew up in the city among the concrete 

In wind he stood tall, would never retreat 

He ran with the Bulls and Never sweated the Heat

Through harsh winter cold with nothing to eat

When practice was over blood ran from his feet

He United the Center filling up every seat

The game winning shot without missing a beat

There once was a rose who grew from concrete. 

Dale Fanella

The Stuff Film Review

There are certain Movies out there that I find interesting and begin to obsess over. I believe this is a common condition in the information age due to increased access to media.  I watched this real gem called "The Stuff"

It starts out with this crazy old man in a snowy mining facility.  He sees this weird bubbling white goo leaking out of the ground and tastes it. MMMM Tasty.

A few months later the goo is being Advertised and Sold all across America with a genius ad campaign that was one of my favorite parts of the film.  The Stuff is putting Ice Cream companies out of business and several owners meet on a boat to discuss hiring a ex FBI corporate spy named David "Moe" Rutherford played by Michael Moriarty who constantly reminds people "they call me Moe, they call me that because every time I get something I always want Mo." This Rutherford guy is silky smooth always saying the right things at the right time and handing out knuckle sandwiches left and right. Rutherford begins investigating The Stuff to find out what exactly it is. 

The Mad Blogger



The Mad Blogger



There once was a Blogger who wrote all the time

He wrote every day always posting online



Sharing his words and Ideas that he had

His audience grew with every post that he'd add

Robbery at Local Mcdonalds

THE HAMBURGLAR

Be Advised. Between the hours of 2pm and 3pm at a local Mcdonalds restaurant a 21 year old man was robbed in a suprise bathroom altercation that left him Hospitalized. As the victim attempted to use the bathroom facility he was savagely beaten and brutally assaulted. Reportedly the attacker stole the victims recently purchased Quarter Pounder With Cheese before fleeing the building giggling maniacally according to security footage.

Hey Joe

This is a Picture of Joe's Dad

Joe gets up early even though he is very tired and has a bad taste in his mouth from chewing beans all night. Joe doesn't have a toothbrush or toothpaste he just puts sugar in his mouth and smears it around with a spoon. Then he drinks a lot of water on his way to the health club.

After working out Joe sits in the sauna for a long time percolating. Finally Joe is ready to take on the day. Joe gives himself a big thumbs up in the mirror and says "I am Joe." Someone else in the locker room says "Hey Joe."

Midnight Express Film Review

The other day I watched a movie based on the true account of American student William (Billy)  Hayes who was caught with hash taped to his chest at a Turkish airport and sentenced to hard time in a Turkish prison. The film was  called "Midnight Express," a prison expression for an escape attempt. 

Top Ten Things That Matter In Everyday Life

Punctuality

Making a late payment and showing up late are essentially the same thing.  When you show up late, you are not only wasting other peoples time (bringing down moral) but giving the impression that you are incompetent.  My coach used to say "Being 15 minutes early is better than being 5 minutes late." Sometimes you can't help it and when that happens just take responsibility for what happened, nobody likes excuses. Time is money, how are you spending yours? No one ever got fired for being early.  

Appearance

Most of the time a simple costume is all the audience needs to believe in a character. In our society we all  label/judge people based on the clothing they wear or don't wear. Don't let your fashion choices send the wrong message about you. Take pride in your appearance and remember that someone is always watching. Make sure that when you engage in a job or activity you at least look the part. People always judge a book by its cover. Often times what you see, really is what you get.  Just ask this guy.    

Top 10 Pain In The Ass Injuries!

10. Hangnail Rip

Clip it. Don't Rip it.

9.  Roof of Mouth Hot Pizza Burn

Let it cool down first. 

Merry Christmas Conspiracy Theory

My back hurts, I need a beer!

"It's the most wonderful time of the year." Or so they tell me.

People are busy hanging up decorations, buying expensive gifts for loved ones and making plans to celebrate the end of the year or the possible end of the world as we know it.  

It may be a little too late but I have some thoughts regarding this whole "most wonderful time of the year" business.

You see in an effort to increase profits and  distract us during the winter months corporate society attempts to sugar coat what is really 
going on. 

J. Edgar Film Review

Last week I went to see "J. Edgar" by myself. Literally! 

I was the only person in the whole theatre so right off the bat I figured this movie was gonna suck.  Just as I started to appreciate my solitude, a portly middle aged couple arrived and sat right next to me. I was annoyed by this breach of my personal space but what could I do? The three of us watched the film and here I am a week later feeling compelled to write a review.  

Adult Malehood

“Man strength” is a term my friends and I came up with when we were about 13 to describe why an adult male (such as the school janitor) could kick our butts even though he was no bigger than us . 

The Week or the Strong who got it going on?

Feel so far from my peak

This is the hardest week

Even though i'm hungry 

I never wanna eat 

Even though im tired

I hardly ever  sleep

I feel incomplete

Like I cant compete

I wanna return my problems 

But I don't have a reciept

I stand six feet tall

Until I'm  six feet deep

I accept life's losses 

Except defeat

Seven days without strength

Will make one weak.  

Dale Fanella